What The….

July 21st, 2006 by sicantik

Today…strange…why the topic which I ever…ever…want to hear or discuss had to come up…
it definitely had made the day gone weirder, and also very strange…even somewhat annoying…

Those were the downside of today’s event…but the fun part was that I had a chance to get out of the house and hung out with my friends…just to catch up…
And also I managed to call up a friend of mine, and we talked…a lot actually…it was quite fun…and realizing that people do change…and I believe that’s a good thing…

From today’s experience, I learn that when the topic ever comes up again in the future…please…please…don’t give any kind of opinion…’coz it won’t matter anyhow…it will eventually happen and I have to let it go…no good in pursuing things that cannot be avoided……
I have to try to remember that…
And the other thing is that opportunities will present in the strangest way possible and might as well be un-expected…

By keeping this in mind, as Boim has suggested through his comment in one of my logs [thanks for the suggestion btw - red]…maybe I will try and found out about the opening at ITB. I believe it won’t hurt to try…:))

The Insomnia Hits Again….

July 19th, 2006 by sicantik

It’s 2 A.M. now, and I’m still awake, pondering…
I guess my old friend insomnia has visited me again…hmm..since early this week I think…
A lot on my mind…ideas, thought, which I couldn’t put them down…

Like last night…around 12, I laid awake in my bed….just stared at the ceiling…with a rush of thoughts running through my head…which had made me got up from bed, practically running down…and turn on the computer and sent emails…

Usually I get a visit from my old friend whenever I’m stressed out, have a lot to think of…but am I right now??

Maybe, with all the things that have been going on…I’m wondering maybe there are things that I could do to make all go smoothly…

Now, I just want to write things…meaningful perhaps…nonsense maybe…at least I want to clear my chest for a while…

Ayah has been back for 2 weeks now…he seems happy with the familiar surrounding…no more fever, controllable blood pressure, and it seems he also made a lot progress with the physiotherapy that he’s been having….I am happy…hopefully things will go better after this…

Considering that, I am thinking about my personal state of well-being…for not being employed and doing almost nothing. I’ve tried to make myself busy with non-important things…but still I feel some things are missing in my life…it’s like working is the essence of my existence…crazy I know…
Fortunately, my former employer still wants me back…they are even willing to wait for me to make my decision…
but still, I have doubts…don’t know why…and also due to the un-reliable-human-being who hasn’t gave any date upon taking up the responsibilities….crap!!!!

But looking at Ayah’s condition, I am certainly going back to work…for the sake of my well-being…just don’t know when…

It’s almost 2.30 A.M now…with no TV in my room (temporarily ofcourse)…and it leaves only me and my laptop (Agoes’ to be exact)…I hate internet connection in Indonesia…it’s soooooo lameeeee….I couldn’t download almost anything crappy from the internet…I miss The Netherlands…hicks…hicks…

Talking about The Netherlands…My life in Enschede was perhaps the closest thing for being normal…I had a house which I could roam around…lived peacefully in a 3-rooms-apartment, owning my own space…what a wonderful life….now???? Well, I’m back at my parents, with a crappy internet connection, jobless, and trying so hard to find private moments….[sigh...]

Enough said…hopefully tomorrow will be a better day…and I’ll have all the chances in the world to make my life worth while………

Thank You..from the bottom of my heart

June 28th, 2006 by sicantik

After a long time, I still didn’t realize how much people do care about us.

After my last blog, I received a lot of comments,phone calls and sms’ from people whom I haven’t heard for a long time…Gestures of sympathies and prayers are all included.

Just would like to thank you all for all the kind words and prayers…may God bless you all and all of your family…and may what has happened to our family could somewhat be a lesson for all of us…and just to remind us how short life is and for that we should always appreciate and cherish the people around us.

Especially for all the nurses at TTSH Ward 13…We really…really..appreciate all of your help in caring Ayah while he was there…and I think..he sometime misses all of the nurses there…:).

Currently, he’s still at my grandparents house..and we are still waiting for the house to be ready for his home-coming…while Ibu and I are still cramping in one tiny room in the house..trying to go through every day like a normal day…while me personally…still trying my best to regain normality in life…:)

The Past Half Year

June 25th, 2006 by sicantik

So many things have happened in the past half year….good, happy and sad things in my life.

In December 2005, we finally returned back to Indonesia for good…there’re some good emotions but also sad ones, thinking that I won’t go back to Enschede and memorizing the first home I had…always make me sad..:(

That December, I re-united we the whole family. My siblings came from

Australia

and we vacationed in

Singapore

for around 10days. It was a happy times for all of us.

After that, we all went back to

Bandung

, with the condition that Agoes and I were jobless. Ayah and Ibu lent us their house in Gegerkalong for us to stay, while we were out looking for jobs.

So, we cleaned and repaired the house, it was some hard work. But I enjoyed it a lot. Eventhough, still misses Enschede a lot..:(

Mid January, I got accepted to work for an HR Consultant in

Jakarta

. So, I had to move to

Jakarta

while Agoes still left behind in

Bandung

. Fot the time being, I lived with Neng Aisyah at Oom Aso’s apartment in Taman Rasuna.

For the whole 3 months, Agoes and I had to live separately. During that time, almost every week I had to go back and forth Jakarta-Bandung-Jakarta. This is quite common in

Indonesia

actually. But sometimes I still miss the life we had while we were in Enschede. Eventhough I didn’t have any job, but I still had some activity outside the house and most importantly, Agoes and I lived under one roof.

Until in April, Agoes got accepted by Nokia Networks in

Jakarta

. So, he also had to move to

Jakarta

. We decided to rent a room around Kuningan area, since it is near both our offices.

Only one week we started living together again, I had to go back to

Bandung

, since Ayah got his 3rd stroke in

Bandung

. In 5 days, Ayah’s condition got worsen, so the whole family decided to take Ayah to

Singapore

for his treatment. At that time, there were only Ibu and me in

Bandung

.

By the time Ayah arrived in

Singapore

, late afternoon, Mas Len and his family plus Yani arrived in

Singapore

. Unfortunately, by the time they arrived, Ayah was already in a critical condition. At that stage he couldn’t speak and he also didn’t open his eyes. While, before he left

Bandung

with Ibu, I still could talk to him and he still could see me.

4 days after Ayah’s arrival in

Singapore

, I followed them to

Singapore

. I was surprised to find that Ayah was in a critical situation. Everything was very sad and gloomy at that time. I coulnd’t imagine, that only e few months ago we all there in

Singapore

having a great time..and now, we have to be in the same place with sad situations.

Ayah was admitted to Tan Tock Seng hospital. It was a good hospital and all the nurses and doctors were very kind to us. And maybe because of all the good treatment, after around 1.5 weeks, Ayah regained his consciousness. He started to open his eyes but that’s it. We felt grateful since in that way, we could communicate with him. And fortunately, the doctor said that he could still hear and sometime feel us.

So for about 1 month, Ibu, Yani and me, we all took turn to sleep in the hospital every night. So I learnt how to take care of Ayah. Everyday, we try to speak to him, give him encouragement and give him some exercise to move his fingers at the least.

Now, we’ve been back to

Bandung

for almost a month now. From Tan Tock Seng hospital, we moved Ayah to St. Borromeus hospital in

Bandung

. He stayed there for almost 3 weeks and just got released by the hospital last week. Currently, he has to stay in Serayu (his parents’s house) because we are still renovating the house for Ayah’s convenience later on. Fortunately, we can walk to Serayu, so I could go back and forth as often as I want.

As far as my career and family live goes, all of them have to be postponed. I had quitted from my job and I have to live separately again from Agoes. Well, maybe I was destined to live like this. I just hope now that my whole family be given the strength to face this.

Can’t Help Myself…But I Am Soooo Mad!!!

November 3rd, 2005 by sicantik

Huh!! Menyebalkan!!!
Lebaran taon ini..sooooo sucked!!!!!!
People suppose to feel joyful during this time of the year..but not me…
Always…always…and always….Agoes tuh harus deh bikin gue kesel…selalu!!!
Ga ada hari lewat kalo dia ga bikin gue kesel…KESELLLLLLLL!!!!

Setiap hari musti berantem untuk hal-hal yang ga berguna…
yang gue dibilang cerewet lah, bawel lah…well…you know why I became that way?? It’s because you annoyed me so much!!!

Semua-semua harus diatur..gue paling kesel kalo harus diatur-atur…mending kalo diaturnya bener…yang namanya Agoes tuh apa ga pernah ngeliat diri sendiri dulu apa sebelum kasih criticism???
Belom lagi…I’ve had it with his attitude…apaan tuh?? Kalo gue ngomong A, dia pasti  kaya orang yang ga pake otak ngomong B…padahal yang gue bilang tuh bener..and gue tuh ngomong gitu bukan buat apa-apa..tapi buat ngasih tauk yang bener…eh..dasar aja…keras kepala…ga mau kalah..terus harus aja ngelawan gue…Udah berapa lama…beberapa hari tepatnya..setelah gue reda dari marah gue..tauk-tauk nanti dia ngomong…"Kenapa ga A aja???"  Aaaaaarggghhhhh….bikin kesel aja!!!!!!

At times like this…I wish I’m still single….live after marriage sucks!!!!!
This is one of the reason why I didn’t want to get married in the first place…:(
What can I do?????
Cape ngadepin orang yang keras kepalanya nyaingin diri sendiri…:((

Open House!

October 1st, 2005 by sicantik

Today we had to go to the market very early, since there would be a lot of people coming in the afternoon to scout our furniture.
Hopefully, they would buy them..not just looking.
So today was kinda ‘Open House’…where people came and see the inside of our apartment and asked questions about the price..hehehe..

The result…mmm…I believe it was quite positive…I hope they would buy them..especially the bed, the wardrobe, the drawers, the sofa, and the buffet in the dining room…than I would be relieved…pheewww…

We began to advertise our furniture mm..around early this week…and almost all of them has been sold…I am quite pleased with that…even today some people has came to take away our TV (one of our TVs , since we used to have two..) and yesterday one guy came and bought the TV-rack…and he commented that it’s a nice piece of ‘thing’…hehehe…ofcourse..all of my ‘things’ are nice…I picked them by myself…with a lot of nagging and complaining ofcourse…:)

Anyway..some people will come on Tuesday to pick the tables and chairs and our ‘lazy boy’ and the dining-room cabinet. So..we think that the apartment will feel very empty by then…I’ll put the picture when they’ve gone.

Een Triest Verhaal

September 29th, 2005 by sicantik

Vandaag heb ik mijn afscheid genomen van mijn vrienden op ROC Twente. Eerst, voelde ik me niet zo triest, maar toen zag ik mijn vrienden gezichten, voelde ik me een beetje triest. Ze waren zo goed tegen mij. Ik zal dat niet vergeten.

Ik praatte ok met Marian, mijn lerares. Zij zegde tegen mij dat ik nooit Nederlands zou vergeten. Ik moet nog Nederlands gebruiken als ik in Indonesie ben. Daarom geeft zij haar email adres voor mij om haar te emailen. Ik zal dat mischien gebruiken want sommige mensen van de groep vraag als ik een postcard kan sturen.

Haterlijk bedank allemaal. Ik zal nooit jullie vergeten. Jullie zijn altijd in mijn hart. Ik zal ook missen onze besprekingen en meetings. Ik zal jullie een briefje sturen als ik in Indonesie kom aan.

Wedding

September 23rd, 2005 by sicantik

I just finished the first 3 episodes of another Korean Drama titled Wedding..the serie itself is still ongoing (at least that’s what the review said)…but for me..I like the story so far..hmm..usually I think the Korean dramas always lame at the beginning…but this one is quite different..I didn’t feel bored watching the first episode..actually, I felt intrigue…that’s a good sign..hehehe..

Furthermore..I feel that the characters (the guy and the girl) have a chemistry between them…ooo…it’s like watching Full House all over again..hahaha…I am so happy..hehehe..
I could not wait for the other episodes to be downloaded…:))

Anyway..I like the storyline…it’s about a girl..who is madly in love with a guy..whom..well..you can guess it…ofcourse he loves another girl..a childhood sweetheart. But the Girl doesn’t care whether the Guy loves her or not..as long as he doesn’t hate her. So basically, it’s a story about a one-sided love…hicks..so sad…but I admire the Girl’s enthusiasm. She believes that love will grow eventually..wow….so determined!

One-sided love, Love will grow in time..hmm..sounds familiar.?!?
Anyway..I watched them while I was taking a break from cataloging ‘the things’ for the moving…phewww…I am so tired…moving is hard!! I love my things..I don’t what would I do without them…hicks…

Final Decision

September 20th, 2005 by sicantik

Keputusannya udah dibuat…gue & Agoes bakal balik ke Indonesia akhir November..ga lama setelah Agoes defense PhDnya…

Well..apa boleh buat..prospek kita disini susah banget..terus..keliatannya ‘hati’nya Agoes juga ga disini..

Tapi sedih juga mau ninggalin semua ini..yah..frankly..it hasn’t been easy for me..but all of the luxury I got by living here and by having earnings in euro’s …hehehe…

Sekarang harus mulai pusing lagi mikirin masa depan..making new plans, and saving a lot of money for those rainy days ahead of us…

Yang paling deket…mikirin pindah-pindahan…all of these things…what should I do with them?? Sell them? Give them up? Throw them away? or Pack them up and deliver it to Indonesia?? crazy thoughts…hehehe…

Anyway..I am between sad and happy right now…but I believe…I SHOULD believe..that all of these..are for the best!!!

Chilli Crab

September 12th, 2005 by sicantik

The story went back on last Saturday…
We were walking at the market, as usual, and suddenly it hit Agoes to go and take a look at the fish market whether they have crabs or not..the full crab that is..
And fortunately they had it that day.

At first I was quite hesitant to buy those crabs since..well..I am a little bit stingy when it comes to doing groceries…as I have already planned all the things that has to be bought…but I couldn’t resist  Agoes and his puppy-eyes…hehehe…[and due to the fact that he's the one who's bringing home the money...hahaha...]…
So, this time I tried to be nice to him, by letting him buy those silly crabs…damn!!!…^^

Anyway..he didn’t get off that easily with those crabs..since his original plan was to cook some marinated-chicken that day , for which I already bought a whole-frosted-chicken as he requested, I threatened him [literally threatened], that he should cook those silly crabs today, or else….^^..[I am a feisty girl, aren't I...hahaha...]…and ofcourse, he did it…:))

So, he was busy in the kitchen that whole Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning…first..he made the chilli crab then he started marinated the chicken and left it the whole night…

The preparation for cooking the chilli crab was…hmm…somewhat annoying…and it took a long time…he used the recipe from a recipe book which we bought the last time we went to Singapore…but the recipe was quite strange I think…anyway..we had to try it…

I remembered it took about one hour or more to prepare for the seasoning…and it cooked for about 30mins or so….and the result was….

…..da..da…..

Chilli_crab_1Chilli_crab_3

Does it look like the real Singaporean Chilli Crab?? One thing for sure…It tasted quite nice…hehehe..

Agoes_and_his_chilli_crab

     And look…doesn’t he look determined?? hehehe..I bow to the great chef in
    this household…^^